My revered and always embracing Global Family! Tonight, I sit in my tiny upstairs bedroom porch garden— the sound of a cricket and a distant dove creating a natural symphony with the whoosh of the cars whisking by. More crickets add their voices to the mix and the magic is palpable.

Yes, today has been a very powerful and emotional day. The one year anniversary of the Beautiful Boulder — a boulder that launched us onto this life-changing journey. It has indeed been a tsunami of change, but as the waves subside, where there once was sand now lies a beach full of gems.

“Yes, I have seen nightmares, but those pale in the presence of a world of sublime grace. To feel the prayers, the hope, the generosity of friends, families and “strangers” is to feel the breath of a choir of angels on my face. The world’s outpouring of love and generosity has changed my world in a way that no “mere” brush with death can compete. We are strong through this not because we fight to be strong but because the “knowing” is so strong– the faith is so strong– that it is “natural” to be strong. We feel your prayers. We feel your hope. With your wind at my back I face this quest with the determination of a warrior and the faith of a saint. I never feel that I walk alone and I will never falter.” February 2016

Little did I know when I wrote those words almost a year ago that our family would grow to embrace so many! As I begin to acknowledge one, I realize just how many of you angels there are! So let me say yet once again, “THANK YOU!” You have no idea how your comments, your “hearts”, your generosity and love bolstered our spirit and our determination!

The sun has now completely set. The only light is from the screen of my computer and the streetlight ahead. The stars are my confidante. The huge oak tree cloaking the streetlight is my sole companion.

 

Saya and Robert have returned to Orlando. Schuy is dozing dreamily in a late nap. Forrest, who continues to be heroic in epic proportions, waits patiently downstairs. My mom is reading in my office. Joe is working on his computer. Even the dogs and my neighborhood duck friends are at peace. It is a moment of beauty and mindfulness. Actually, even more than that— it’s a moment of powerful In-Joy-fullness!

It has been a delicious weekend— full of celebrating Life and True Meaning. On Friday, our family met Amalita, her husband Jaime and Robert’s mom Stacy at one of Schuy’s and my favorite restaurants in the world: BT. My son Linden and his girlfriend Jordan took me there several years ago for my birthday and it was instant addiction. Think alternative foodie chic… all white… curtains covering the walls…. clear plexiglass chairs… zen gardens outside filled with harvestable edibles.

Surfside “sake-tini”… chilled sake with muddled mint and cucumber in a chilled metal martini glass…. tuna sashimi… wild mushroom stuffed artichoke… salmon in a mouth melting sauce… vegan tofu vegetable mélange like you can only dream off… sumptuous chocolate mousse… a euphoric culinary experience, only outdone by the phenomenal company! To think that this Beautiful Boulder had brought us all together! Such joy! Such love! Such harmony! It was almost like a moment from the Grinch. Thanks to the impact of that crazy rock, each of our hearts had grown two sizes— if not ten!

Yesterday was equally amazing. Forrest had arrived after midnight early Saturday morning. To open the door and see that smile! What an amazing young man! Always eager to help! Always laughing! Always saying and doing just the absolute perfect thing for Schuy. I remember seeing the emotion when he first came to visit us in Miami. These have been turbulent waters for him to navigate but he has emerged to be a more than capable captain. He showers such love on our sweet Schuyler!

And speaking of love, Forrest and Stephanie orchestrated probably the most perfect Valentine’s Day “onslaught” of affection from Schuy’s world of friends that you could ever imagine! Roses! Sunflowers! More roses! More sunflowers! Gifts! Chocolates! Cards! Creations! Wow! We are still making our grin-inspiring way through them! The florists and mail courier must have wondered what celebrity lived behind our door! When we got home from therapy— oh my goodness! I had to wade my way through all of the arrangements, boxes and goodies! Schuy could not stop laughing and smiling!

So last night was the date of our traditional (what I call) the Goofy Gift party. Twenty four of the most amazing people descended upon our townhouse for the annual revelry! You might wonder how this is even physically possible but add multiple strands of twinkly lights, a “fire column”, some plants, table cloths and guided frames and it’s amazing how inviting a garage overlooking a pond can be!

During the decorating process, we had what Schuy would call a typical Mom moment. I confess, I seem to attract animals in distress. Schuy and I would plan a basic bike ride by the ocean and it would become a 4-hour rescue-an-injured-bird (who we would of course have named by the time that the rescue organization arrived) mission. That is me— simply who I am. Schuy has learned to love and accept that.

So as I’m dragging stuffed chairs and tables around the garage, I’m delighting in the sound of what appears to be a baby duck. Suddenly, this lone baby duckling rounds the corner and stumbles as if he is in one of those Hollywood movie scenes where the hero is attempting to escape an impossible number of bad guys. We made eye contact and unfortunately my size apparently did not comfort him. He turned in his tracks fearing that he was running (yet again) for his life. I followed. The poor little thing battled with all of his (or her) might through a mud puddle and disappeared into the bushes. I plopped some high quality all-natural duck food (I know… I’m insane sometimes) down by the bush and decided that I had probably best not attempt to intervene. I went back into the garage and started arranging furniture again. Before long, I hear it…. that cute little cheep, cheep (where the heck are you, mom) baby duck talk. I look up. My dear little duck buddy totally surprises me! He comes running (ok, maybe it was more like cute baby duck waddling) INTO the garage and before I can close my dropped jaw, he is all the way into the back corner, behind the bikes, next to the water heater. OH DEAR!!! This is when I panic! What to do!! This is also when Nancy Souza arrives!

I give Nancy a quick I-Have-A-Duck-Barricading-Himself-Into-My-Garage-Did-Schuy-Not-Tell-You-About-This-Admittedly-Unhinged-Part-of-Me hug! And yes, after a few moments of acknowledging how THRILLED I was to have her here, I blurt out about the duck baby. Schuy and Forrest are on the couch. Schuy cracks up. It’s going to be a great day. Mom is being mom. And the duck world can feel it.

Nancy and I go back out and see the poor little thing hunkering down. In my totally out of alignment mind, I am afraid that the little duckling is giving up. That said, I don’t want to capture it and put it outside because I am pretty sure that without its Mama, this little darling is on borrowed time. I am stressing big time. Could the dogs handle a baby duck brother/sister? What about Joe and the car? Would he be willing to park outside of the garage for the next few days… gulp, weeks… ok, months until his royal Babyness has grown enough to be safely released back to the pond? Oh the thoughts that go through your mind when you worry about the Universe’s little creatures!

We continue to prepare for the party. I am wondering if I should be thinking of appropriate baby duck names… Suddenly, Nancy comes running in from the garage and tells me that there are a million gajillion baby ducks with a duck mom out by the pond. I race back out. OMG!! Another miracle! This MUST BE this little one’s mom! Nancy moves one of the bikes. I get some cloths and delicately swaddle the shivering little duck friend in the corner. Nancy, the dear baby duck and I head across the way to this mom and her duck family. At first she tries to ward us off. We gingerly set our baby duck friend on the ground next to her. He runs to her with a relief that is tangible. Nancy and I hugged as we watched this amazing reunion of this mom and her baby duck chick. In their world a miracle had truly happened. In our world, God Universe had given us yet another hug. At about this time, we learned that Dana’s “little bird” project has been 100% funded (thank you!)!

We couldn’t make this up if we wanted to! Thank you, God Universe!

The Goofy Gift party was yet another magical celebration of life and about living in those moments of In-Joy-fullness. Thanks to Amalita, we were “fighting” over a honking rubber chicken smoking a cigar. It was a time when you could put a “Burger King” mask over your head and ham it up for the camera or just lovingly steal some inflatable flamingo cup holders from your neighbor who didn’t really want it anyway. It was very much a night to let your sparkle shine. Who would have thought that one could feel such magic in someone’s garage? And yet, that is apparently what Life is trying to teach us!

Within each of us is the brightness of the stars. Within each of us is the melody of the cricket— a sound so defining and mighty from a creature so incredibly small.

So as we move forward, my desire is to unveil my own new web site www.ilovemyimpossible.com . The world AND YOU have given me so, so much over this past profoundly impacting year. My desire is now to give back with a power and a message as sublime as I can muster.

Like Schuyler, my “ask to the Universe” has always been to share my inner Joy and to help change the world. I spent many decades actually trying to “make” people see the happier version of themselves. I learned (sometimes painfully) that in order to guide someone somewhere, you actually have to wait until they decide that they genuinely want to come.

One of the biggest gifts of my lifetime has been the gift of what some would call a pair of rose colored glasses. I know, I know— not usually something that one would claim appreciation for. And yet one would not typically expect a mom of a critically injured child to feel calmness and joy.

At the risk of using a cliché, “things are not always what they seem” and precisely thanks to my rose colored glasses have I been able to embrace a slightly different perspective. This unique perspective has given me some unusual insights and some definite clarity.

I believe that we EACH have the potential of immense power. There is truly no one like any of us. We ARE the game changer in the equation… and yet, before we even understood that we are here to change the game and to unleash our own “secret recipe”, “it” started. The negative, “reality-based” programming. By the time that we were 7 years old, many of us now defined ourselves as shy or “not great in school”. Not realizing what we were doing, we bought into a belief system that sent us cosily into a tiny compartmentalized and paranoid world of underachievers. Our natural default point is not even what you could call “cautiously optimistic”. We are addicted to problem identifying and our minds have even sometimes become a version of a CNN reel where we replay those same problems over and over again. Only in this case, there aren’t even a few commercial breaks to give us some respite. We are non-stop “shoulding” all over ourselves and “shoulding” all over others. So how do we break the spell? How do we shed this skin and catapult out into the world that we want so much to love and truly supercharge this lovely Earth with our sublime version of uniqueness?

Those are the questions that have been racing around my head? How can I personally— me, Meridith — help others to first see and then embrace all that is truly AMAZINGLY AND UNIQUELY them???!!

The idea that came to me was a subscription series web site where those of you who are interested can come to “play”. As another way to “give back”,  a portion of the subscription proceeds will be donated to the ICU at the Colombian Hospital Manuel Beltran, where our string of miracles first began. Eventually, as our volume of subscriptions grow, my goal would be to allocate funds that could be used to build more ICU facilities in the small regional hospitals that currently don’t have them. My understanding is that the majority of small regional hospitals in Colombia do not have ICU facilities. Imagine how many more lives could be saved if they did! Had Schuyler been taken to one of those, they might not have had the tools to treat her. Yet another miracle in our story!

So, my wonderful global family, for those of you who have asked how I got to the point where I could be so happy in the midst of such heartache or how I could be so brave when faced with such a dire crisis, or for those who would simply like to come play along with us on this journey, I humbly offer you my new www.ilovemyimpossible.com .

I will share with you many more of the insights that helped me survive during this first year of Schuyler’s recovery. I will share with you actual techniques and exercises that I adopted long before this boulder struck. I will help you to identify the boulders in your own life that you may not yet even see. I will help you to understand the thoughts that no longer serve you and the definitions about yourself, about life and about those that you love that might actually be sabotaging you.

I will also help you to learn to celebrate! Celebrate ALL that is uniquely you… ALL that is uniquely Life… ALL that you can finally unleash when you learn to CRAVE the sensation of appreciating all that is most definitely YOU……….! There will be written words and exercises. There will be videos and podcasts. I will even be offering some day long “learning celebrations” and some “Re-Joy-venation Adventures”. In other words, my goal is for there to be sharing and learning with a huge, all-encompassing dose of fun.

My dear, dear global family— today is not just a celebration of my gorgeous daughter’s life, this is a celebration of all that is US! We ARE a global family. We laugh. We cry, We share. We FEEL. And if it takes a beautiful boulder to make us see the beauty within and within then let those boulders fall!

We are an exception group of little creatures. We have an energy that goes far deeper than the headlines. We have a unique spark and like the tiny cricket, our voice can define the night. If you have taken nothing else from our story, I ask you to take away this: No one on this planet is alone. We are all entwined in this beautiful web of hope, intent and promise. Angels DO walk not only among us, but within us. We are intended to be special. Our one tiny voice can inspire great change. The power of our miracles stems from the power of our love, not from the power of our rationalization. YOU have a gift! YOU have a mission to share this gift. Revel in your own mighty cricket voice. You may be small, but others will listen. As you breathe in the crisp night air, stare up at the sky and soak it all in. Agree to be the ray of light that pierces through the darkness in a way that no night sky could be the same without you.

What a year we have lived— and I say with resounding force LIVED! If our story has touched you in even the smallest of ways, we ask that you use our beautiful boulder to unleash yours. Yes, dear global family, in honor of Life, embrace the BOLDER side of you. Dig deep. Dig joyously! This is a family of angels and we have many more miracles to achieve!

In Joy,

Meridith (and family)

Meridith Hankenson Alexander

www.ilovemyimpossible.com